I have not posted in a while and I wanted to at least update after Mark's visit to the Cancer Center on Monday. We have been waiting for the results of the PET scan and we were able to see those yesterday. The results were good, the doctor was pleased and Mark did not have chemo yesterday and so will have time to heal more.
I guess that I am not sure how I am feeling with all of this. I am happy, of course, that the scan was good but I guess that there is still that knowledge in the back of my mind that it will come back at some time. I don't want to be pessimistic or not trust God's faithfulness but I do want to be realistic and be ready for what is supposed to come in the future. It is that living one day at a time that is hard - not looking forward and wondering about tomorrow. It is that fine line of trust and being prepared. I am ready for some days that Mark is better and not suffering from some sort of reaction to the chemo and life is sort of normal.
I am so grateful that God is good and only wants my best and He will see to it that His glory and my good will be the outcome.
I completely understand your apprehension. The two of you have been through a lot. The point is – you’ve been “through” it. You didn’t stop in the middle. Now it’s like waiting for the other shoe to drop. All I can tell you (from experience) is that it’s best to live the blessings of today and allow the Lord to work on the tomorrows. I have found that by taking my focus from living today’s blessings by worrying about what “might” happen tomorrow (or the next day) I rob myself of what God is trying to give me today. I can diminish my own blessings by not taking full advantage of them when they are given. I have to ask for His forgiveness continually because I’m too busy spending my energy in the wrong areas. Do all you can, Evette, to suck the marrow out of every day. It’s time you will only get once – don’t waste it. Love you a bunch, Sandy Roy
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